Thursday, 26 August 2010

Of loyalty Tests and undercover agents!



[no offence to cats please!]


Arrggghhh...my first reaction, followed by a grin [the one that comes on when one is really amused]. I am amazed at how my sister finds UTV's Emotional Atyachaar worth a watch. On a regular basis my sister can watch television non-stop. Its a hobby she maintains and that too, very patiently. When I say patiently, I mean to say that I have got to give it to that girl for her immense patience to sit through realty TV shows and sitcoms that make you wonder...did John Baird make a mistake?


Now I happen to walk in on my sister watching yet another 'interesting' episode of Emotional Atyachaar. The reality show has now shifted base to the country's capital after pretending to have wrecked homes and scores of relationships in Mumbai. So here is this woman [won't call her a girl because she ain't one!] sitting with the compere/VJ [yeah, they all have aspirations] describing how much she loves her man. Apparently, they have 'done it all' [we are still in denial, remember?] and have even decided on their baby-to-be's name, who of course happens to be a boy called Vansh. So little Vansh is already this woman's apple of the eye and she thinks her man feels the same. 


The man in question happens to be a choreographer or so I gathered. Now the lady knows that her family is against this relationship and will never agree to accept the boy. However, she continues to regale us with her tales of how she sneaks out of her house to cook him dinner or take him some food, how she satisfies him and so on. She, at a point, even declares "Woh mera bhagwan hai"... dialog writers listening? 


Yet, for reasons best known to her, she wants a loyalty test conducted. Why? No clue. The very term 'loyalty test' rings a bell or rather a bell for knell in my head. I am thrown into flash back when Miss Kashmir was subjected to utmost cruelty and was beaten up because someone mistook her for a look-alike in a porn clip. And that is when I first got to hear of the forensic - Virginity Test. Really could there be one? A virginity test and a loyalty test? Interesting. 


Back to the serial - She is done with her tales. The television screen now shows the chap [I won't keep him as a chaprasi] and an under-cover agent who calls him. Now the undercover agents are interesting pawns in the reality show as well. They have no identity or so the channel thinks. Girls and guys alike are supposed to pretend and then lure the victim into their trap. And while luring them they can go to any heights. This is perfectly alright with the channel who strives hard to maintain their agents' integrity and izzat. Whenever they seem to get into a sticky situation, they call up and ask them to come way, which by the way the agents manage amazingly. Sigh...is life so pathetically scripted? So obviously these people have no life of their own or people back home or a girl/boy friend to be answerable to. 


The so-called pretty agent begins to spin her web and the man is of course caught. He ends up spending a lot of time with her while his would-be wife sheds tears, drinks glass after glass of water. The reality show compare keeps rubbing it in your face that hawww...that man spent the entire night with the girl! Reality check...din't they want this to happen? Else how do the TRPs come?


Climax: The man is caught red-handed and the fat-load of misery [apni pativrata nari]is all set to bash him up. Suddenly there is a change in her demeanor. She starts to abuse, rant and so on. The man...takes it all in his stride and ends the relationship. He got what he wanted while she bared her pathetic life in public. 


Moral of the story: What did the channel and the show achieve? Was there some money to be earned or a foreign trip? None at all. Yet, the atyachaar continues...literally. 


P.S: Yes, I have allowed myself to be inflicted with such pain, all thanks to these reality shows. 

32 comments:

Mehak said...

haha. i was going to write a post about emotional atyachaar too! i even started on it but then thought oh what a waste of time. lol
i happened to see bits of the episode you've mentioned involving baby Vansh. lol
excellent write-up!

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ Mehak

I am glad you share my feelings. These are wasted on my sister. Thanks!

SSD said...

The channel has achieved what it wanted. Your attention and eyeballs.

Btw, it's 'compere' not 'compare'. :)

Nikita Banerjee said...

@SSD

You are right...and correction made! :) thanks.

@RagsTweets said...

Lovely post. Will you permit me to post it on my blog - I will give you the full credit with your Twiter and Facebook IDs?

Thanks in advance :-)

@RagsTweets on Twitter

@RagsTweets said...

Lovely post. Wold you be kind enough to permit me to post it on my blog with full credit to you - and your Twiter, Facebook IDs disclosed?

Thanks in advance

D2 said...

So very interesting. I myself have never seen a single 'Emotional Atyachaar' show. Not that I have a tv set I can comfortably watch, where I'm at, but the show sounds pretty pathetic!
And it certainly is interesting how people get hyped up on watching other couples go through the atyachaar!
PS. They are mostly girls.

Nikita Banerjee said...

@Rags_Tweets

Well you can do so. Put my name: Nikita Banerjee in the credits and the other info you mentioned. Also can you drop a comment here giving the link of your blog?

@ D2

Good that you have a TV now but please do not even think of watching this show!

D2 said...

Oh no, luckily I'm in a hostel, so I can't watch the show even if I was curious!

Creation said...

OI watched 3 minutes 40 seconds worth of this show at my cousin's place on rakhi and successfully managed to get him to change the channel.

I am lucky.

Funnily enough though, we were discussing exactly this Spectacle phenomenon in our class today.

You've read Barthes' Mythologies?

Iggy said...

I saw this episode too..was laughing throughout...and I swear, would not hire that guy as my boot polisher also! lol..anyway..ye atyachaar bande pe bohot 'bhaari' pada (pun intended ;) )

tahera said...

Amazing!!! You are echoing my feelings...Since the show is very popular, it goes to show sadism is what people enjoy...how can someone else broken lives be entertaining?

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ D2

Hostel does some good, doesn't it? :D

@ Creation

Sigh...how and why do people watch it?

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ Iggy

Thanks! :D

@ Tahera

Yeah I agree on that bit. What I find amusing is - can't people see through it? I mean its all rigged!

Raj said...

see lady, they call it the idiot box for a reason. respect it :)

and itna hi free time hai to do something worth doing. like chatting with internet friends.

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ Raj

You are right! :P

sujata said...

I did not know such a serial existed, thanks for opening up my horizons!! seriously the whole thing is too funny.

vishesh said...

Ha! I didn't know such a show existed...how funny...jobless people :P

Arslan said...

Voyeurism is a desire within most humans. It is hard not to pause and watch a 'Tamasha' in progress. This particular show takes it to an extreme by manufacturing one, as well. If I had to guess, I would say this show must be very popular!

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ Sujata

Just try the show once for fun sake and you'll know how I feel!

@ Vishesh

And they get paid for this joblessness!

@ Arslan
Of course the show is popular...people like my sister watch it and make it a hit!

As the Mind Meanders said...

The trouble with the show is that it implies that there is a high probability that everyone cheats...

And I wonder... If things were hunky dory to start with... Why would anyone want to do a 'loyalty test'

The relationships were probably headed dooms way anyway... EA or no EA...

And I just love the term 'undercover agent'

Nikita Banerjee said...

@ Meandering Mind

Dost...the very term, they think gives them an edge and qualifies the show as being real. Bah. Losers.

buckingfastard said...

ohh cummon i love da show...i love the real slaps da guy gets...i could almost feel the sting...btw who wudnt choose to fall for such well endowed undercover agents instead of clingy crybaby girlfrnds!! i wud even if i knew it was all fake

cosmobong said...

Nikki nice post..

Well I did watch couple of episode of 1st edition of EA as I know the creative team behind it and was told the 1st edition outnumbered Roadies in terms of TRP.. so I guess there are enough people who do watch such shows.... like there are enough who do watch India TV ;)

Like any other reality show, mostly everything is scripted.. part of the game.. :).

Nikita Banerjee said...

@Buckingfastard

In that case...you are gifted with immense patience sir!

@ Cosmobong

Long time no see! How you been? What is the creative team behind the show like if they think their show is creative and regale in the fact that they get so much TRPs?

zephyr said...

awesomely written!!! :)

blunt edges said...

Well the show sure has added a new phrase to our vocab - Loyalty Tests!!

Nikita Banerjee said...

@Zephyr

Thank you! :D

@blunt_edges

I swear! Bah.

Erratic Thoughts said...

Funny enuf, but I saw this episode(first n the last time I ever tried watching this tragic stuff!)

*Urgh* and they say it's a family show.That female says/does it all!Are we supposed to turn deaf ears/blind eyes to them then?

Sneha said...

Of course, shows like that are the so called 'modern trend' of today. I don't understand their thought process about this whole thing. It has a lot to do with voyeuristic pleasure on the part of the audiences actually.

A lot of drama goes on the sets of such shows. Anyway, well written.

Although I abhor such shows, I won't say that infidelity isn't on the rise. It is and how!

Nikita Banerjee said...

@Erratic thoughts

Those are exactly the questions I want answered!

@ Sneha

Haha well said!

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