Eons ago, on my first trip to Kolkata, our train, the slow Howrah express had come to a stop for a good two hours, right before entering the station. It was a frustrating wait what after 36 hours of a train journey from Mumbai to Howrah. It was a time when AC trains were a luxury and so everyone made peace with sweat odours mingled with food smells and what not. Long and arduous as it was, some stupid signal was inciting my restlessness even more. Nonetheless, we had to wait as there was no other option. The only thing that kept me going was that my then-favourite cousin was expecting to receive us on the platform. On the journey, I had befriended a couple of kids who belonged to one of many many Bengali families travelling with us. The little boy was super cute but naughty. Like me, he too wanted to rush out of the compartment. So along with my sister, his older brother, he and I were hanging onto the window. Suddenly, he started to yell, “Pompa… O Pompa…” I was horrified. Whatever th…
Dear Ms. I-am-a-feminist-when-it-suits-me, Your beguiling eyes got to me through your display picture on the now-defunct social media network. It was love at first sight for me. Fortunately, you reciprocated my feelings, and we began our journey as girlfriend-boyfriend. You were everything I never knew I wanted in my girlfriend – feisty, witty, smart, intelligent, warm, caring and of course, a master manipulator. I loved the fact that you chose me as your confidante and shared your concerns and the dreams of future. Only I never to be a part of your goals or your future. All was well until your journalism projects were done and dusted for which I ran across government offices to seek permissions on your behalf and then drove you around to complete your work. I became a stalker overnight. Without any rhyme or reason, you shut me out. When I stood below your window or drove by your home, you threatened me to have me arrested. P.s. I hope you have met your match in your ‘sansanikhez’ husban…
Dear love of my life, I still remember our very first meeting – your tear-stained cheeks and your vomit-soaked frilly frock in Kindergarten day 1. You had cried your eyes out. It was only later when I offered my extra biscuit to you that you started talking to me. Our friendship was based on food, sharing crayons and innocent hand-holding during PT class. Over the years, our love for food turned into crazy experiments, and we even burnt a part of your mum’s kitchen. Even your folks had come to accept me as a permanent fixture in your life as we began and ended our days together. From kindergarten to school and then to high school, our friendship evolved. Your empty threats of making me your rakhi brother never failed to freak me out. I wanted more than friendship. And the year we turned 17, I thought we were ready for the transition. I only wish I had never let you go on that camping trip with your girlfriends. I should have never let you break our deal of trying rafting together. And …
Dear puppy love, Your undivided attention was a
brand-new feeling. I felt sought-after, even beautiful. I looked forward to the
constant group dates and stolen kisses, watching films you liked, hanging out
with your friends even though I had a lot of reading to catch up on... I felt
alive and thrived as I thought you loved me in my worn kurta and Kolhapuri
chappals. Your confusion over me moving to a prestigious girls college was cute
too. Little did I know it was only a façade. The constant pressure of wearing
makeup, heels and short skirts bored me to death. You were relentless in the
quest to box me. When you blamed me for meeting a new boy in a girl's college,
I should have dumped you then. Still, we could have carried on,
evolved too had you not flung my books. P.s. I prefer dogs – puppy or
not, over you. Yours sincerely, The-girl-who-dumped-you-for-books!
My first impression of you was 'hate', no actually it was an annoyance. I hated you. You replaced me in many ways – gifts were given to you, new dishes were made for you, clothes, accessories and the works. I was constantly told nothing would change and my authority would never dull. But then, these were just empty words and as soon as you stepped in, everything was forgotten.
You worried me too. You were weird. Your choice of food was tasteless but you never cared to share or ask me. Rude was your second name. Blah. Then I got used to your presence. You offered to share too. We found time for each other. Chatted and exchanged sweet nothings. Thanks to my great sense of humour, you always cracked up. Though we had a shaky start, we became friends and relied on each other. But good things never last, do they?
I am never the one to intrude or interfere but hello… that girl whose doll’s head I took a bite off, is your new best friend? And thanks to that stupid, t…